questions

torn into 2

spending time in medicine - i've learnt to love the field and the work, the immense variety of diseases here in med is amazing and so fulfilling (with all the observation and deduction to be done) something which you'll certainly never get in Melb. also the amount of skills learnt here as a hseofficer is spectacular as well. and would take years to do in Melb. but what am i saying? all of these were taken into account when i considered the position

but now.

my earlier decision of going to XY is receiving flak from ppl here. esp when i say i wanna come back. they laugh or cynically snicker. most of the response is because they want me to stay here which i can understand. but do they know how housemanship is really like? that i wouldn't have time to go church? will they really make the effort to keep in contact, to come and see me? will they genuinely miss me or are they going to miss the piano?

which makes me wonder if i really can do so?

and above all the nagging bit that keeps telling me i'm meant to be here...

what do i do Lord?